And instead of cutting off my own feet, which, quite frankly is something only a complete ass would do, i'm going to cut off the feet of my fellow scientist, fishjizz. This is not entertainment, but rather a scientific venture!

You see, www.cutoffmyfeet.com is a one shot deal (unless he decides later to amputate his arms as well) which means there's no opportunity for repeat revenue. And let's face it, [arms folded, glasses removed] it's not very scientific either! Instead of just cutting off fishjizz's feet all in one go, I'm going to select objects of varying violent potential and mathematically apply them to his feet in a physical fashion. You see, both math and physics, SCIENCE!

First fishjizz's feet will be assualted by a plastic upright fan which will result in nothing more than bruises and flesh wounds. Next, his feet will be run over by a Geo Metro occupied by very heavy clowns, which, in all likelihood will yield broken bones and the like. After that his feet will come up against a lawn mower. Chances are he'll crawl away from this one with a few missing toes. And, finally, he'll place his bloodied feet in a tank full of sharks and we'll throw a few scientific piranhas in as well, in the name of science.

Now that's four seperate live internet broadcasts, and at $20 per viewer per show, mathematically multiplied by 200,000 viewers, that's a BIG number!

To prove that we are in fact scientists, and not dorks with webcams and a lawn mower, we've put on white lab coats, which, as anyone who's seen the movie "Twins" knows, only bonafide scientists are allowed to wear.

Actual quotes:
"We can be the scientists that tread where no other scientists would dare!"
-fishjizz

"And just to prove it, YOU'LL tread water in pool of sharks after your toes have been chopped off by a grass cutter!"
-feda