Just a joke. I have not been injured. Please send sympathy cards, flowers, and preferably money anyway. You can find my address by doing a google search on my name and reading the USENET post where I begged for people to mail me $5 as part of a popularish pyramid scheme at the time.

Also, If you're looking for a diary where a 16 year-old girl whines about her parents a lot, just click on any of the diaries on the recently updated diaries page. But if you're looking for the same kind of diary, only this time written by a girl named Allison, then go here .